Half-assed weekly check-in

Half-assed because not much of this is actually about the whole weight loss thing!

This week has been something else, for sure!

Week 7: September 19, 2011 --- 315 lbs.

I don’t even know what to say about the whole not-a-diet thing. This has been another week that surprised me with a loss. I feel like I do horribly, but obviously I have made enough changes that my metabolism is increasing, so I’m grateful for that!

I've mentioned before I chop all my veggies. Here's what my fridge looks like on produce shopping day! (The iced tea is my homemade tea - caffeine free, sweetened with Splenda - I make 5 gallons at a time)

I call this "the universe yelling at me for sneaking in a cup of Mountain Dew"! (If you can't tell, it's a bee.)

We didn’t get our normal produce shopping in this past week, which hurt me a great deal. I need to have that stuff on hand! We have a virtually empty fridge and freezer right now, but Kes is out produce and meat shopping right now, so all will be well soon! (This was written around 2pm, but I’m not sure when I’ll be posting it because I need Kes to come home and take my weekly picture.)

I screwed up totally on my Energy and Mood Journal this weekend. I did not get a lot of “work” done, but I still consider it to have been a rather productive weekend.

I spent several hours rescuing an injured kitty. Unfortunately, she had to be put down . . . I cannot stress enough to people how important it is to spay and neuter your pets. No living thing should suffer the way the poor kitten did! And please, please . . . if you see an injured animal, call animal control or SPCA! So many people came by when we were taking care of the kitten and told us that they saw her the day before outside their yards. Even if she wouldn’t have survived if she was picked up earlier, they could have saved her so much suffering!

Today is another one of those “this sucks!” days. I considered writing an entire blog post about this, but I just don’t want to give it that much energy. Many of you read my post two weeks ago about the anniversary of the day my mom died. She died exactly 16 years, 4 weeks, and 1 day ago. I was exactly 16 years and 2 weeks old. Today marks a day that I have been dreading. Today, I have officially lived more of my life without my mom than I did with her.

I know the whole date focus may seem wacky to some, but I’ve always had a thing for numbers and they just come to me and then I focus on them. And the fact that she passed so close to my birthday just made it really easy to realize.

I have my playlist on shuffle and about 20 minutes ago “Because You Loved Me” by Celine Dion came on. If I could pick one song that encompasses how I feel about my mom that would be it.

For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right

For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in you
I’ll be forever thankful, baby

You’re the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You’re the one who saw me through
Through it all

You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn’t speak
You were my eyes when I couldn’t see
You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn’t reach
You gave me faith ’cause you believed
I’m everything I am
Because you loved me, ooh, baby

You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach

You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love, I had it all
I’m grateful for each day you gave me

Maybe, I don’t know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because
I was loved by you

You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn’t speak
You were my eyes when I couldn’t see
You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn’t reach
You gave me faith ’cause you believed
I’m everything I am
Because you loved me

You were always there for me, the tender wind that carried me
The light in the dark shining your love into my life
You’ve been my inspiration through the lies you were the truth
My world is a better place because of you

You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn’t speak
You were my eyes when I couldn’t see
You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn’t reach
You gave me faith ’cause you believed
I’m everything I am
Because you loved me

You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn’t speak
You were my eyes when I couldn’t see
You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn’t reach
You gave me faith ’cause you believed
I’m everything I am
Because you loved me

I’m everything I am
Because you loved me

I was going to bold the lines that exemplify how I feel the most, but I would have bolded the entire song!

My sophomore year of college, I think. Around 200 lbs. (P.S. I totally miss my eyebrow piercing!)

Anyway . . . still progressing, slowly but surely! So, all in all, I call that a good not-a-diet week, even if some of the other bits were not so wonderful!

(I was going to write about the reality show “Heavy” because a friend recommended it to me and just from checking out the website, it looked really interesting . . . but with everything going on, I didn’t get a chance to watch an episode. So, that’s on the list for next week!)

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12 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Anne Katherine on September 19, 2011 at 7:36 pm

    Wow, that fridge is way too organized! Ugh…I need to get mine looking like that. I have been inspired by you, though, and I have been chopping up our produce as soon as we get it home. It certainly does make it so much easier to make better choices when all the “hard work” of washing and chopping is done beforehand. Hope you get loaded up on produce soon!
    And I LOVE your baby pic – that is so sweet. And I don’t think it’s wacky at all to focus on dates – I do the same thing. If I didn’t, I might forget everything, and I certainly do not want to do that.
    Keep on keeping on! You’re doing great – and thanks so much for sharing your journey!

    Reply

    • Haha, that’s only on produce shopping day . . . it gets much messier throughout the week!

      I’m so thrilled to hear you’re chopping up the veggies right away and that it’s helping! That’s awesome 🙂

      I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one who focuses on dates! I like your way of looking at it . . . that without it you might forget everything and you don’t want to do that . . . I’m very much the same!

      Reply

  2. Awww 😦 I feel like giving you a great big hug right now but you live a bit too far away so you’ll have to settle for a virtual one!

    Good job keeping up the good work and I agree with your friend about the fridge….dang, you don’t want to see how messy mine is! AAHHH!
    I watched the first season of Heavy and liked it….one of the places they offer it is a place in Austin, TX. so I actually looked up the pricing plan of going to one of those places…When I saw it costs about $40,000, I was disappointed. Insurance does NOT cover it, by the way. Which told me either the people on it had a lot more money than a lot of people OR maybe the producers paid for it? Don’t get me wrong, the show is very inspiring, but I feel like if I had the kind of resources and help the people on the show did, maybe it would be easier for me as well, you know? It’s one thing losing weight when you have dieticians, nutrititionists, trainers, psychologists, etc. that are 100% invested in you because it’s their job. It’s harder trying to copy what they do on those types of shows with out ALL that help.

    Reply

    • Thank you! Real hugs are awesome, but virtual ones mean just as much!

      I’ve had the same argument about celebrities who lose weight. I remember watching an episode of Oprah years ago and she said, “If I can lose weight, anyone can!”

      I wanted to add to her statement that anyone with a personal nutritionist, chef and millions of dollars can!

      It’s difficult to lose weight on a budget. It’s difficult when you can’t afford personal trainers and whatnot. But reading your post has put some ideas in my head . . . we’ll see what comes of them!

      Reply

  3. Good job on the fridge! I love that you make your own iced tea. My parents used to do that … ah, memories!

    But I’m sorry you had a rough week. What you did for that kitty would make your mom so proud. I started tearing up when I read the lyrics to that song … it used to be one of my favorites. (And I’m happy that someone else likes a Celine song, most people make fun of her! I love her!)

    I hope this week is better! And I’m looking forward to your post on “Heavy.”

    Reply

    • My iced tea saves me from drinking soda. I am soooo picky about what I drink. The only iced tea (besides mine) that I really like is diet Rosenberg’s, but most places don’t sell it. So, if I’m out of tea and I can’t get Rosenberg’s, I break down and buy Pepsi or Dew. And I drink a lot . . . a little more than a gallon a day! Because my tea’s caffeine free and sugar free, it’s as good as drinking water (as agreed upon by my doc) 🙂

      Thank you so much for your sweet words, Jen! It means so much!

      I’m not a huge Celine fan, but I do enjoy a few of her songs 🙂 “Because You Loved Me” came out after my mom died and I can still remember the first time I heard it. I was in the backseat of a car and it came on the radio. I listened to the words and just started bawling!

      Reply

  4. Wow! This is the first time I’ve seen your energy and mood journal! Where did you get that idea? Do you mind if I try it for myself? =) I’d like to even include a column on foods I eat because I think it really affects my mood a lot.

    Also, I’m glad to see that I’m not the only person taking naps a lot! Haha! =) I find myself falling asleep after lunch or in the late afternoon. Yeah, I know, I should bring my laptop to my bed and think that I won’t fall asleep. Unlike you, though, I usually end up waking up feeling groggy and grumpy that I “wasted” so much time when I could have been productive. How do you turn that around into energy for productivity instead? =)

    And thanks so much for sharing that Celine Dion song, Dayle. Love that photo of you and your mom. =) Hugs! Consider this an exciting new stage of life yet still with her. =)

    Reply

    • Thanks Sam!

      The Energy and Mood Journal just came out of wanting to know what really makes a difference. I figure it will take a couple more weeks, but then I can go through and highlight different areas to see what really affects my mood and energy . . . and hopefully I can continue without medication 🙂

      Let me know if you start one for yourself and if it helps!

      I LOVE my naps! I have never had a normal sleep schedule. And even when I sleep normal hours during the night, I wake up a bunch of times. Naps usually help me to be more productive . . . unless I’m napping because of depression or illness, then it’s a whole different story!

      “Consider this an exciting new stage of life yet still with her. =)”

      ::hugs:: I’m trying!

      Reply

  5. I remember that Celine song. 🙂 My sister had the CD and we listened to it all the time. I always thought of it as a romantic love song, but this puts a new perspective on it and makes it more beautiful.

    Your Mom is always with you Dayle, just remember that. 🙂

    Reply

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