I opened up the “in progress” folder on my desktop to see if I could possibly finish one of the six posts I’m working on (among them are a piece on boxes for The Write On Project and a post about closet racism). There are, of course, far fewer documents in this folder than in its sub- “on hold” folder (which includes a post about when I was poor, one about kid-free zones, and one about depression or politics – I was never sure which way it was going).
In addition to the “in progress” and “on hold” folders, there is also the index card box filled with topics to write about. And, of course, there are the posts swimming in my head that haven’t made any progress toward any kind of writtenness. Among those is an update on the whole weight loss thing.
And all of this adds up to the fact that I have had an exorbitant amount of trouble finishing a damn thought lately. In December, I blamed it on the holidays. In January, I blamed it on seasonal depression. In March, I just gave up justifying it at all. And now, in April, I’m attempting to rectify it.
If you gather anything from any of this (aside from the fact that I’m so neurotic that my lists do, in fact, have lists), it should be that I really am trying. While there may not have been many finished products lately, I have been pushing forward with the writing process. I think that counts for something.
Still, I long for finished products – they make me feel all accomplished and proud and like a real writer and stuff.
So, I’m sitting here with my “in progress” folder open and determined to pick one and finish it – maybe the short story about escape or my response to Jared’s letter.
It’s the first day of the week and the first day of the month and we’re cleaning the house today and it’s Spring and Spring means renewal and all this adds up to the perfect time to turn all this unfinished thought business around!
So here goes . . .